{"id":306199,"date":"2017-03-29T15:01:34","date_gmt":"2017-03-29T15:01:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/citifmonline.com\/?p=306199"},"modified":"2017-03-29T15:01:34","modified_gmt":"2017-03-29T15:01:34","slug":"3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy"},"content":{"rendered":"

The irony of course, and what I\u2019ve discovered through experience, is that it\u2019s sexy to ask someone \u201cCan I kiss you?\u201d. Here\u2019s why:<\/p>\n

\n

First, it shows confidence.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Receiving a verbal, flat-out no, is the strongest form of rejection. Sure, it\u2019s not pleasant to have a cheek turn away from you, but hearing that actual words no, is more soul-crushing.<\/p>\n

If a man or woman had the courage to ask, they\u2019re going out on a limb. They\u2019re putting themselves out there in a vulnerable position. If that\u2019s not confidence, I don\u2019t know what is.<\/p>\n

Second, it shows respect.<\/strong><\/p>\n

It shows that you think of the other person as an autonomous person, and by giving them the ability to chose, you are giving them a voice. You are no longer objectifying them. You are valuing their thoughts and desires.<\/p>\n

Third, it makes the other person feel comfortable.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Making out, or anything more sexual is not enjoyable when you don\u2019t feel comfortable and taken cared for. If he\/she\/they is not feeling safe, whatever you\u2019re doing will not be pleasurable for either you or him\/her\/them.<\/p>\n

I would also like to point out some of the flaws in the reasons for why one shouldn\u2019t <\/em>explicitly ask.<\/strong><\/p>\n

First flawed reason: I don\u2019t need to ask. I can tell by body language.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Um\u2026 I\u2019m calling, bullshit. There is no one with 100% accuracy who can tell the difference between someone who is incredibly friendly and flirty.<\/p>\n

Body language is a key component. Don\u2019t get me wrong, but it\u2019s like the sketch of a picture. Verbal language is the color. You need both body language and verbal consent to get the full picture.<\/p>\n

Second flawed reason: It ruins the momentum.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Really? It ruins the momentum? I\u2019m not buying it. You haven\u2019t done anything yet. Finding and putting on a condom, that\u2019s something that ruins the momentum because you\u2019re already in the middle of something. It\u2019s annoying as hell, but you always do it.<\/p>\n

With this, though, you haven\u2019t started anything yet, so how can it ruin momentum? You were dancing? Great! Ask, and if he\/she\/they says yes, then make out while you start dancing again. If the momentum can be lost THAT easily, then there was nothing really there, and you shouldn\u2019t be doing anything to begin with.<\/p>\n

Third flawed reason: I want the guy to have the courage to go for it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Already explained. It requires more courage to ask that to just \u201cgo for it.\u201d<\/p>\n

I was in a bar. I ordered a drink next to a woman and we spoke for about an hour. She was flirty, touching my leg, laughing. I thought I was killing it. I asked her if I can kiss her, and she erupted into laughter.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo! God no!\u201d She said. I started laughing because I was embarrassed, but also because it was funny how much I misread the situation.<\/p>\n

Through my awkward laughs, I managed to get out, \u201cThank God I asked.\u201d<\/p>\n

She continued laughing. \u201cYeah, sorry. I don\u2019t want to, but\u2026\u201d then she trailed off to what we were talking about prior. We spoke for another hour and then I hugged her before she left. My friends came over and asked what happened. \u201cShe seemed so into you,\u201d they said. I said, \u201cYeah, I thought so too. But apparently, she wasn\u2019t. Great talking to her, though.\u201d<\/p>\n

I look back on this and smile. I got rejected. I got laughed it. But it\u2019s kind of humorous how much she didn\u2019t want to kiss me. How badly I misread the situation.<\/p>\n

That said, I\u2019m still alive. I\u2019m stronger for it, and I\u2019m happy I asked. Life happens. You will get rejected, but that\u2019s a good thing. That means it was the right decision to ask in the first place.<\/p>\n

So ask. Always ask. You\u2019ll grow as a person because of it, and your partner will like you even more for confidently displaying how much you respect them.<\/strong><\/p>\n

–<\/p>\n

Source: Your Tango<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The irony of course, and what I\u2019ve discovered through experience, is that it\u2019s sexy to ask someone \u201cCan I kiss you?\u201d. Here\u2019s why: First, it shows confidence. Receiving a verbal, flat-out no, is the strongest form of rejection. Sure, it\u2019s not pleasant to have a cheek turn away from you, but hearing that actual words […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[354],"tags":[1628,3,1629,355],"yoast_head":"\n3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The irony of course, and what I\u2019ve discovered through experience, is that it\u2019s sexy to ask someone \u201cCan I kiss you?\u201d. Here\u2019s why: First, it shows confidence. Receiving a verbal, flat-out no, is the strongest form of rejection. Sure, it\u2019s not pleasant to have a cheek turn away from you, but hearing that actual words […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/citi97.3\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Kojo Akoto Boateng\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@citi973\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@citi973\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Kojo Akoto Boateng\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/\",\"name\":\"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1642ef473fe39bf0c4e2f2f252678eb1\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/\",\"name\":\"Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always\",\"description\":\"Ghana News | Ghana Politics | Ghana Soccer | Ghana Showbiz\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1642ef473fe39bf0c4e2f2f252678eb1\",\"name\":\"Kojo Akoto Boateng\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ba51f5385119e83762c67ecd6aa410ab?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ba51f5385119e83762c67ecd6aa410ab?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Kojo Akoto Boateng\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/author\/kojo\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always","og_description":"The irony of course, and what I\u2019ve discovered through experience, is that it\u2019s sexy to ask someone \u201cCan I kiss you?\u201d. Here\u2019s why: First, it shows confidence. Receiving a verbal, flat-out no, is the strongest form of rejection. Sure, it\u2019s not pleasant to have a cheek turn away from you, but hearing that actual words […]","og_url":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/","og_site_name":"Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/citi97.3","article_published_time":"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00","author":"Kojo Akoto Boateng","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@citi973","twitter_site":"@citi973","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Kojo Akoto Boateng","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/","url":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/","name":"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy - Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00","dateModified":"2017-03-29T15:01:34+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1642ef473fe39bf0c4e2f2f252678eb1"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2017\/03\/3-reasons-why-asking-permission-before-kissing-is-sexy\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"3 Reasons why asking permission before kissing is sexy"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/","name":"Citi 97.3 FM - Relevant Radio. Always","description":"Ghana News | Ghana Politics | Ghana Soccer | Ghana Showbiz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1642ef473fe39bf0c4e2f2f252678eb1","name":"Kojo Akoto Boateng","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ba51f5385119e83762c67ecd6aa410ab?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ba51f5385119e83762c67ecd6aa410ab?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Kojo Akoto Boateng"},"url":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/author\/kojo\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/306199"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/14"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=306199"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/306199\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=306199"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=306199"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=306199"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}