{"id":160018,"date":"2015-10-15T18:14:46","date_gmt":"2015-10-15T18:14:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/4cd.e16.myftpupload.com\/?p=160018"},"modified":"2015-10-15T20:15:11","modified_gmt":"2015-10-15T20:15:11","slug":"on-gifty-antis-marriage-thoughts-on-what-a-feminist-future-could-be","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/2015\/10\/on-gifty-antis-marriage-thoughts-on-what-a-feminist-future-could-be\/","title":{"rendered":"On Gifty Anti’s marriage: Thoughts on what a feminist future could be"},"content":{"rendered":"
First and foremost, congratulations to Gifty Anti and her husband on their marriage. I wish them lots of laughter, fun and the guidance to navigate the intricacies of marriage.<\/p>\n
Perhaps you\u2019ve heard the news, TV personality Gifty Anti got married today. It has been in the news and the topic for conversations since the marriage was announced. As usual folks are not just celebrating her, but saying some sexist, mean and plain idiotic things. The focus has been about her finding a man to marry at age 45.<\/p>\n
Case in point, this person who claims it is rare for a woman Anti\u2019s age to find husbands.<\/p>\n
<\/a><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Most of the headlines, comments on social media and conversations suggest she is lucky or she waited too long to do this. On social media, people are thanking God for finally blessing her with a husband. Others are commending her for finally becoming submissive enough to attract a man. People are also thanking her husband, Nana Ansah Quao for marrying a woman her age. References have been made to her \u2018biological clock.\u2019<\/p>\n It is true that Gifty Anti\u2019s marriage was always going to become news and a national conversation. She is a successful TV personality who is popular and loved for the work she does for women and children\u2019s rights. But judging by the public reaction to the news, it seems many Ghanaians believe she has now arrived \u2013 you know, like now that she has found a man, she has achieved everything \u2013 she is now complete.<\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n Interestingly, I still don\u2019t know how old her husband is. No one is talking about his age or how lucky and blessed he is to have a successful, well-connected and hard-working woman for a wife. The fuss about Gifty Anti\u2019s age and her marriage highlights our society\u2019s ingrained sexism \u2013 where no matter a woman\u2019s achievement, her worth is attached to her husband\u2019s.<\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n This is not a uniquely African or Ghanaian thing, when 50-year-old George Clooney married a successful human rights lawyer, the headlines were about how fortunate the woman is. The world media only recently stopped hounding actress Jennifer Aniston about marriage and babies. Over here, single women are nagged endlessly about marriage. I would know, I am not married. Every day some random person reminds me about ovaries.<\/p>\n That Gifty Anti is a successful businesswoman with a thriving media company, a widely watched TV program and a public relevance in a space very few women thrive should be enough, but it isn\u2019t. Those who insist that people are talking because she\u2019s a celebrity must look beyond the veneer.<\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n Marriage has been turned into the biggest achievement for women, not having a man or husband at a certain age is seen as a deficiency for women everywhere. Even so, our case is special, our kind of sexism is crippling and limiting.<\/p>\n It is the kind that reinforces traditional and sexist gender norms. It is the kind that teaches women and girls that society will not appreciate your brilliance until you have a man. It is the kind that allows a powerful preacher to tell educated women that \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter how pretty and beautiful and intelligent you are; until a man proposes to you, you are going to stay beautiful, pretty, intelligent, nice and whatever, and rotten.\u201d<\/p>\n Due to patriarchy\u2019s grip on our society, women and girls are taught and trained for the male gaze, erasing their humanity and privileging male ambition over a women\u2019s.<\/p>\n