{"id":45037,"date":"2014-09-05T11:51:56","date_gmt":"2014-09-05T11:51:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/4cd.e16.myftpupload.com\/?p=45037"},"modified":"2014-09-05T12:02:21","modified_gmt":"2014-09-05T12:02:21","slug":"3-signs-youre-actually-still-in-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/?p=45037","title":{"rendered":"3 signs you’re actually still in love"},"content":{"rendered":"

“To get divorced because\u00a0love<\/a>\u00a0has died, is like selling your car\u00a0<\/strong>because it’s run out of gas.”\u00a0<\/strong><\/em>\u2013 D. Sollee<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Charlotte and Finn thought they were on the verge of a painful and expensive divorce. They came for couples counseling because they had fallen out of love, or so they thought.<\/p>\n

There were frequent arguments and complete emotional shut-downs. To make matters worse, there had been no physical\u00a0intimacy<\/a>\u00a0for several weeks. Charlotte broke down into tears describing the disconnection. Finn quickly shut down not knowing what to do or say, with a look of real fear on his face.<\/p>\n

This kind of we think we\u2019ve \u201cfallen out of love<\/em><\/strong>\u201d couple is actually my favorite to work with. Why? Because all that hurt, anger and frustration; all those tears, well, they clearly indicates that underneath it all, a couple is actually still very deeply in love.<\/p>\n

What I\u2019ve discovered is that with a little help, these couples can quickly harness their frustrated emotional needs to motivate quickly reconnecting with each other. All they have to do is plug those frustrated needs directly into re-building profound emotional and physical intimacy together.<\/p>\n

Here are 3 signs you\u2019re still actually deeply in love and what you need to do to prove it to each other:<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. You\u2019re Partner is More Like your Best Friend than Your Lover<\/strong><\/p>\n

This is the most important sign that you are actually still very deeply in love with each other. Why? Just ask any happy couple who\u2019s been together for decades what the secret to a lasting relationship is. They\u2019ll both tell you that it\u2019s all about seeing each other and treating each other as best friends.<\/p>\n

One of the biggest but easiest to fix relationship harming assumptions most couples have is that being in love needs to be passionate and intoxicating like when they first started their relationship. But that\u2019s just the \u201cromantic\u201d or \u201choney moon phase\u201d in your lifelong healthy couplehood journey.<\/p>\n

After the first few months to a year, it\u2019s totally normal for your honey moon phase to fizzles out and for \u201cmy best friend\u201d phase to kick in.<\/p>\n

So yes, your partner is your best friend. There\u2019s no need for a break up. This means you actually still love each other and just need to makes some changes in your relationship. With work there will be\u00a0romance<\/a>\u00a0more profound than you\u2019ve ever experienced.<\/p>\n

2. You\u2019re Having Little to no\u00a0Sex<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

If you want to get the sex back in your marriage you need to get the love back into your sex!<\/strong><\/em>\u00a0It\u2019s that simple. That\u2019s what best friends in a healthy marriage do.
\nRecent research<\/a>\u00a0is very clear that emotional intimacy is the key to a couple enjoying lifelong sexual intimacy. This is especially true for woman!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What\u2019s the bottom line? The secret to lifelong physical\u00a0intimacy<\/a>\u00a0for both men and woman is that\u00a0sex<\/a>\u00a0is more enjoyable for women in\u00a0love<\/a>.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The majority of woman in a major recent survey stated that love is very important to be able to sustain that intimacy and have a successful lasting marriage. They also said that love made them let go of their sexual inhibitions, and because of that, sex became more satisfying for them.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What\u2019s perhaps most telling about the nature of physical intimacy in long term relationships is that the majority of women in the older age group being studied (up to 68 years old) also said that love and sex continued to be strongly connected in their marriages! What\u2019s the message for the fast majority of\u00a0couples<\/a>\u00a0having relationship problems? Fix your emotional connection and you fix your sexual connection.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

3. There\u2019s no Communication – We Argue Too Much<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Of course you argue; and arguing is just the opposite of effective communication. Why is that? Because your underling need for connection through properly expressed best-friendship is deeply frustrated right now. If you didn\u2019t love each other so much none of this would affect you.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The more frustrated and angry you feel, the more you actually love your partner inside. Learn to properly express and accept each other\u2019s emotional intimacy needs and the arguing and other negative relationship behaviors will fizzle out.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

So how do you get rid of those negative surface feelings and relationship behaviors that keep getting in the way of growing your best-friendship as a couple? You\u2019ve probably heard it 1 million times, but it\u2019s time to take real action: It\u2019s time to learn how to \u201ccommunicate\u201d effectively!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

So where do you start? Start by making\u00a0a solid mutual pact to save your relationship<\/strong><\/a>. Healthy couplehood is like a 2 person dance pattern, with lifts and dips. One person can\u2019t save a relationship alone. You have to do this as team.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Next, it\u2019s absolutely critical that you turn your relationship into a\u00a0Hurt-Free-Zone<\/strong><\/a>. This is one of the most powerful strategies for preventing break up and divorce. How does this work? Simple: In your hurt-free-zone the four kinds of toxic communication that predict relationship failure and divorce with almost 100% accuracy are simply not allowed to continue.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Once you\u2019ve set up your hurt-free-zone, saving your marriage by making it\u00a0a contest of generosity\u00a0<\/strong><\/a>becomes faster, easier and it will eventual it kicks into autopilot. Meeting your partner\u2019s needs and wishes gets easier and easier as they meet yours and vise-versa. It\u2019s becomes a contagious and virtuous cycle.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Once Charlotte and Finn turned their marriage into a hurt free zone, their relationship stabilized fast. They could not belief how much things started to turn around for them in just days!<\/p>\n

In a matter of weeks they both became\u00a0great\u00a0armchair relationship counselors<\/strong><\/a>. That really helped them save their\u00a0marriage<\/a>. This is an amazing ways to really learn and apply a few simple but powerful couple-communication strategies developed by the world\u2019s leading relationship experts. Charlotte and Finn have now been happily\u00a0married<\/a>\u00a0and best-friends for years. They\u2019ve built an amazing\u00a0family<\/a>\u00a0together!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Source: Yourtango.com<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“To get divorced because\u00a0love\u00a0has died, is like selling your car\u00a0because it’s run out of gas.”\u00a0\u2013 D. Sollee Charlotte and Finn thought they were on the verge of a painful and expensive divorce. They came for couples counseling because they had fallen out of love, or so they thought. There were frequent arguments and complete emotional […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":45045,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jnews-multi-image_gallery":[],"jnews_single_post":[],"jnews_primary_category":[],"jnews_social_meta":[],"jnews_override_counter":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[51],"class_list":["post-45037","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-ports"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45037","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=45037"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45037\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/45045"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=45037"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=45037"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=45037"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}