Ladies, we all want to find the perfect man of our dreams. We want a fairytale ending, where we live happily ever after with the kind of guy we can imagine ourselves growing old with. We all want our Prince Charming, who will look after us, be the perfect gentleman, and who we can introduce to our parents without worrying that he\u2019s going to steal their best China.<\/p>\n
But the wonderful and wacky world of dating often means that we have to date a few bad eggs before we get to the pearl. It means that we have to waste our time talking to losers who we know deep down aren\u2019t right for us. But isn\u2019t it time you stopped wasting your precious time on men like this? It sure is! So let\u2019s take a look at 10 tips on how to avoid wasting your time with the wrong guys.<\/p>\n
1. Heal Your Old Scars<\/b><\/p>\n
One of the reasons we\u2019re continually drawn to the wrong guy is because we haven\u2019t healed our old scars. And it is these scars that keep on drawing us to the same kind of partner.<\/p>\n
It could be that your old scar is related to your childhood; consequently, your unconscious mind causes you to choose a guy who emotionally resembles the person who let you down at some point or another. Psychologist\u2019s call this \u201cStage Setting.\u201d And according to these same psychologists, we\u2019re drawn to people like this because we want to create a happy ending.<\/p>\n
2. Be Aware Of The Bigger Picture<\/b><\/p>\n
Okay, so a guy you\u2019re dating might have a few good qualities. Perhaps he\u2019s a musician who can write a mournful tune that really tugs at your heartstrings and makes you cry. Perhaps he\u2019s actually a musical genius, despite him still busking on the streets.<\/p>\n
But you have to look at the bigger picture, and look beyond his gift. Take a look at the bigger picture; are you just wasting your time with this guy because you\u2019re attracted to his charisma? Does he share the same ambition in life as you do? Would you be able to introduce him to your parents? Does he offer you financial security?<\/p>\n
3. Keep A Rational Head<\/b><\/p>\n
It can be very easy to waste time on the wrong guy. This is because, when we first meet someone we\u2019re instantly attracted to, our hormones rule our head and heart. They go into overdrive, with the release of dopamine giving us such a rush of excitement and desire that we ignore our head that is desperately trying to scream \u201cAVOID, AVOID, AVOID\u201d.<\/p>\n
The problem with our hormones is that they\u2019re largely irrational. They cause us to quickly develop feelings of desire and love before we\u2019ve had a proper chance to assess who this person really is, and whether he is a match for us. We suggest taking a step back to make a conscious decision that is based on your head.<\/p>\n
4. Embrace The Single Life<\/b><\/p>\n
One of the reasons many of us waste time with the wrong guy is because we\u2019re terrified of being left on the shelf. In fact, we\u2019re so scared of being single that we\u2019ll even date the guy our cousin introduces us to, because she \u201cthinks we\u2019ll get along.\u201d<\/p>\n
His name is Colin, he\u2019s a 44 year-old bachelor who is thinning on top, has a podgy belly, and enjoys eating pot noodles whenever he\u2019s spending a whole day watching James Bond films.<\/p>\n
Instead, you should be patient and trust yourself to meet Mr Right eventually. If you are feeling lonely, you could always join a club, do a night class or head out with your friends more often.<\/p>\n
5. Avoid Physical Intimacy<\/b><\/p>\n
Once you make love to a guy, it\u2019s pretty much a case that you\u2019re now an item and breaking it off is going to be a lot more difficult.<\/p>\n
If you know in your heart of hearts that a guy just isn\u2019t the one for you, it\u2019s much better that you avoid all physical intimacy. Otherwise, he\u2019s going to get too close to you and when you finally tell him it\u2019s over, you\u2019re going to break his heart.<\/p>\n
6. Ignore The Sweet Talk<\/b><\/p>\n
Even the wrong guy can charm the birds from the trees. He can cover you with charming spiel that ramps up your desire and makes you think that, actually, this guy could be the one.<\/p>\n
But he isn\u2019t the one. He isn\u2019t even the two. He\u2019s like the fiftieth. See, the wrong guys are very good at saying the right things. They\u2019re fast talkers who have learned how to flirt and convince women that they are God\u2019s gift. Often, though, behind the sweet talk is a shady past. We would suggest that you look beyond all the sweet talk and take a closer look at who this guy really is.<\/p>\n
7. Learn To Say No\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n
If you\u2019re a kind-natured, sweet and wholesome person, it can be difficult to say \u201cNo\u201d. This is a little bit of a problem if you\u2019re dating someone you know isn\u2019t right for you. Rather than end it early, you decide to string him along because you don\u2019t want to upset him and hurt his feelings.<\/p>\n
But by doing this, you\u2019re just wasting your precious time. You might convince yourself that dating this Mr Wrong is better than sitting around in your pyjamas by yourself, but time spent with him is unproductive. It\u2019s better to end things early by having the courage to tell him that it just isn\u2019t going to work out.<\/p>\n
8. Listen To Your Friends<\/b><\/p>\n
Love and desire makes us behave really irrationally. It makes us behave so irrationally, in fact, that we become paranoid whenever our friends have the opposite opinion to us. Rather than listen to them when they tell us that a new guy in our life is wrong for us, we turn them into enemies and tell them they don\u2019t know what they\u2019re talking about.<\/p>\n
But friends have better foresight than you do when we\u2019re head over heels in love, and they also have your best interests at heart. Rather than push them to one side, it\u2019s time to listen to them and their opinions. They could save you from wasting a heap of time on the wrong man.<\/p>\n
9. Spot The Difference<\/b><\/p>\n
There is a difference between being attracted to someone and falling in love with them. To avoid wasting time on a guy you know is wrong for you, it\u2019s important to mark the distinction.<\/p>\n
Sure, you could be attracted to him and you might even find him interesting; but if his lifestyle and values are totally different from yours, it just isn\u2019t worth your time falling in love with him. It could be that he likes to travel, whilst you\u2019re more of a homely person. If you try to convince yourself that you two could work, you\u2019re heading for a rather nasty fall.<\/p>\n
10. Be Yourself<\/b><\/p>\n
Finally, it\u2019s important that you be yourself. If you convince yourself that a man might be right for you, despite all the red flags that say otherwise, you might waste an entire year of your life on a relationship that is going no where.<\/p>\n
Moreover, if you don\u2019t be yourself around him, you might easily convince him that you\u2019re right for each other too!<\/p>\n
To make sure that you find the man whose values match yours, it\u2019s super important that you be yourself. Even if it feels like Mr Right is taking forever to turn up, it\u2019s much better to wait than to waste time.<\/p>\n
Stay happy!<\/p>\n
–<\/p>\n
Source: Beauty and Tips<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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