Have you ever wondered what drives a woman to choose you? If you\u2019re direct and confident while others remain passive, there\u2019s no contest \u2013 you\u2019ll already be the clear winner in her eyes.<\/p>\n
Many single young women navigating the dating scene read my dating advice column, The Babe Report, and email me with their frustrations regarding how tough dating can be.<\/p>\n
What is the most common complaint among these single ladies? Indirect, passive men who have no solid plan, no clear intentions, and make dating feel exhausting instead of fun.<\/p>\n
Granted, there\u2019s some generalising going on here but think of it as a rule of thumb rather than an absolute. David Klow, a Chicago based psychotherapist and owner of Skylight Counseling Center states, \u201cWomen like direct men the same way a salsa dancer likes a good lead.<\/p>\n
When there is clarity and direction, she feels relaxed. If she can\u2019t trust his movements, they step on one another\u2019s toes. If he is direct and clear in his leadership, however, everyone wins.\u201d<\/p>\n
Here, I lay out the four main reasons women love dating direct men. If you want to become a direct man, understanding the appeal is a good place to start.<\/p>\n
The Direct Man Doesn\u2019t Cause Unnecessary Stress:<\/strong><\/p>\n Dating should be fun, not stressful. It\u2019s hard to trust the ambiguous, indirect type, and dating these kinds of guys usually results in the woman\u2019s confidence level plummeting the longer she has to guess how he feels.<\/p>\n When you\u2019re really present with a woman, you\u2019re showing genuine interest and that\u2019s what makes dating enjoyable. You should make her feel secure. Otherwise, her self-esteem is in jeopardy, and her self-esteem is a prized possession \u2013 something she won\u2019t want to risk damaging by playing mind games with unenthused guys.<\/p>\n Sasha Daygame, direct dating coach, creator of The Direct Dating Summit and author of The Direct Daygame Bible: How to Meet and Attract Beautiful Women in Everyday Situations, explains that being the \u201cmysterious type\u201d results in nothing but complications: \u201cThe mystery method was popularised by the book The Game and encourages inauthenticity and awkward interactions.\u201d As an alternative approach, Sasha recommends his direct dating method, which encourages honesty, authenticity and expressing yourself assertively.<\/p>\n The Direct Man Exudes Confidence:<\/strong><\/p>\n Confident men are sexy as hell. And confidence stems from being secure with yourself and it takes confidence to be direct. Women are well aware that these two qualities go hand in hand.<\/p>\n April Masini, a relationship expert and the voice behind the Ask Apriladvice column, agrees that there\u2019s something seductive about a direct, confident man: \u201cMen who are straightforward, open and honest in a relationship project a sexy confidence, and that\u2019s an aphrodisiac that beats oysters any day. Lots of men think it\u2019s money or girth that women are after, but in reality we\u2019re after confidence, a sense of humour and success \u2013 all of which require a man to be direct, straightforward and open.\u201d<\/p>\n Direct men, or the alpha male type, are the type women are often the most attracted to. The reason for this has to do with a direct, confident man\u2019s ability to really go after what he wants. A confident man will pursue the woman he likes. If you\u2019re interested in her, pursue her. Women love it when you make plans with them in advance \u2014 bonus points if you follow up with her the next day.<\/p>\n The Direct Man Doesn\u2019t Waste Her Time:<\/strong><\/p>\n A direct man will be upfront and honest if he\u2019s not feeling a connection after the first few dates, and he\u2019ll have no problem being direct about how into a woman he is when he does feel a connection. Ambiguous men, however, often avoid being honest and would rather waste a woman\u2019s time if it means they can side step an uncomfortable conversation.<\/p>\n The beauty of being direct is that women can feel confident knowing that if something is bothering you, you\u2019ll be straightforward and talk about it, which puts everyone\u2019s minds at ease. If you\u2019re indirect and hard to read, it can be easy to assume you\u2019re not all-in, that you\u2019re avoiding being honest.<\/p>\n The Direct Man Wears His Heart On His Sleeve:<\/strong><\/p>\n A direct man will not beat around the bush due to fear of rejection. He\u2019s emotionally transparent and will communicate openly about what he\u2019s feeling and thinking.<\/p>\n Dr Nicole Prause, a sexual psychophysiologist says, \u201cSome people really struggle to communicate their emotions accurately. Desiring somebody \u2018direct\u2019 is actually code for wanting someone who is aware of their own emotions and can accurately communicate them, but also relieves some of the stress on the partner who is trying to accurately understand their emotions. When any part of this complex chain breaks down, it can be a source of conflict and could even be central to the relationship ending.\u201d<\/p>\n Many women are more attracted to the emotionally transparent man than to a man who is closed-off. Back when we were girls, we may have been attracted to the mysterious, ambiguous man who was tough to figure out. Women, though, don\u2019t have time for that sh*t. She wants you to tell her what\u2019s on your mind instead of shutting off when something\u2019s wrong.<\/p>\n Transparency is also what makes her feel like you\u2019re all-in. It is key in relationships because it allows her to feel closer to you and causes the relationship to progress rather than fall apart. So if you really like her, be direct, and open with how you feel.<\/p>\n –<\/p>\n Credit: The Trent<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Have you ever wondered what drives a woman to choose you? If you\u2019re direct and confident while others remain passive, there\u2019s no contest \u2013 you\u2019ll already be the clear winner in her eyes. Many single young women navigating the dating scene read my dating advice column, The Babe Report, and email me with their frustrations […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":124822,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jnews-multi-image_gallery":[],"jnews_single_post":[],"jnews_primary_category":[],"jnews_social_meta":[],"jnews_override_counter":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[51],"class_list":["post-124821","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-ports"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124821","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=124821"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124821\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/124822"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=124821"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=124821"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/citifmonline.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=124821"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}