How many times in your life have you fallen for an unavailable man? How many times have you given a man space while he sorts out his “issues?”
How many times has a man told you he’s going to leave his wife because he really wants to be with you? How many times have these relationships worked out well for you?
I understand the problem. You meet a guy. You think you connect. He makes you feel amazing, and you so want to believe everything he’s telling you. You give him the time and space he asks for, because everyone needs that space, don’t they?
But here’s the thing…
He loves the whole scenario. He loves that you’re giving him the space he wants. He loves that you give him sex when he calls you. He loves that you don’t pressure him. He loves it, because it’s exactly what he wants from you.
Even though you sense something isn’t right, you still believe what he says. You spend hours chatting to your friends on a Friday night trying to work out what’s going on. You don’t want him to make a fool of you, but you’re starting to worry about your feelings.
The problem is, you’ve missed the warning signs at the beginning of your relationship. You missed the biggest red flag that this man isn’t going to commit to you. You didn’t put him through the “Boyfriend Test” that all men should have to pass!
What is this test?
It’s very simple…
You have to see whether this man follows through with all the promises he makes you in the first 30 days after you meet. You see, when a man is pursuing you, he’s in sales mode. He’ll tell you everything he thinks you want to hear, and he’ll make a bundle of promises to you. He wants to make being with him sound like the most incredible thing in the world.
He’ll tell you about all the cool people he knows, about all the places he goes to, and about all the amazing things he wants to do with you. Keep track of every single promise he makes you. Then see how many he actually follows through on.
He needs to be hitting 100% from the off. If he’s running at anything less than 80% you need to get away before it’s too late. In the first few weeks after a man is with you, he’s on his best behavior. He wants to impress you. He wants you to believe he’s the one for you.
What you see from a man in the first 30 days after you meet, is the best you’re ever going to see from him.
If he can’t follow through 100% of the time when he’s on his best behavior, there’s no way he’s going to follow through for the rest of the time you’re together.
It sounds simplistic, but it’s the easiest way to find out a man’s real intentions. If he’s doing everything he should, then the chances are he’s serious about a relationship. If he isn’t then he’s a man who just wants sex and nothing else.
It’s time to stop making excuses for unavailable men. It’s time to stop rationalizing their behavior, and it’s time to start spending your time with men who really want to connect and have a relationship.
It’s no more than you deserve!